Merciless Eyes
by QuestionMarks11
Summary: This isn't the end, This isn't even goodbye. Oneshot Implied Lilly/Miley


A/N _This story is a result of some Pain, Grief and Complete isolation. _

_Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Hannah Montana. All I got was the unbearable pain._

**Don't cry because it's over, Smile because it happened. **

I hate waiting rooms.

Especially hospital waiting rooms

They are like …a cold, white …Limbo. They are that uncomfortable, impatient space between the known and the unknown. There are always so many possibilities in a waiting room. Absolutely anything can happen. It's in that room that every possible situation and circumstance rushes through your head in a blur of worry, uneasiness and anxiety

I don't think I can take this.

What if …What if…What if….

Ahhhh! It's eating at me, puncturing those few walls of rationality that I managed to slowly pave on the way here.

But now, as the adrenaline wears off I am left with nothing but nerves and empty reassurance.

Doctors and Nurses are bustling around, continuing with their day-to-day activities. They don't understand that my world has stopped. They don't care that I can't breathe. They pass by as I break down, giving into the grief I tried so desperately to hold at bay.

Tears roll down my cheeks, I can faintly taste them on my dry lips. I'm not moving, the tears are shaking me but not my body. They are shaking my heart…my soul. They are braking through every doubt, every hope, and every ounce of faith I still managed to posses.

I don't think she's coming back. Everything I know, everything I though was true and right and good is being ripped out from under me leaving me totally and completely…lost.

I'm lost. I'm lost without her. She means everything to me.

Her smile…Her eyes….Her hair, Her skin, Her body. Hazy memories flood my mind, short clipped slightly exaggerated images, Laughing, Smiling. I only see her. I only see what she was …what we were.

The tears are stronger now, my leaking eyes the only visible recognition I'm giving the situation.

The doctor is here. He's tall. Short black hair, large square jaw. Merciless eyes. He sees me, he knows who I am. He knows who I'm here for.

"Miss Truscott?" He looks at me, still with fat tears rolling down my cheeks, onto my lap now.

I nod …I don't think I will be able to talk for a long time.

"Miss Stewart would like to see you" he says it simply…blankly. Tactfully not revealing anything to me.

I stand up, it aches.

I'm walking to the room. I'm so nervous; what will I find?

I open the door, it creaks open, I look at her and I stop breathing again.

She's lying there. Head propped up by two or three pillows, her wavy chocolate hair spilling across the pillow, he face gaunt…deathly pale. Her lips are white; they stretch dangerously as she attempts a smile at my entrance.

I've never seen anything so broken.

"Lil…" The pain is evident in her voice. I used to love her voice, that sultry twang...That thick southern rasp that curled my toes. Now its just …husk. Croak. Broken.

I smile nevertheless cause she may be broken but at least she's still here. Her voice revives me. I rush over to her, sitting in the seat next to her bed, clasping her bony hand in mine. She senses my distress and she sends me another smile. I can tell its forced, I can tell she's scared out of her mind. I can see her slipping away.

"Lil….Lil" The pain is becoming too much for her, I can see her wincing with every move. I squeeze her hand tighter.

"I know …I know" I whisper, looking into her eyes, they still shine! Her eyes are still here, with me, if I can just look into her eyes, if I can just hold onto those sparkling eyes.

"I don't…wa…want…to …leave" too much, too much pain. Her words are tearing through me even more than her ghostly appearance.

"I know…" it's all I can say, I cant bear to see her try to talk. It's too much pain. I lean over, our hands still connected my face now just above hers. I have to get this out before…before its too late.

I just have to look into her eyes.

". This is not goodbye, this is not the end…." I choke on my words, the pain…Too much for me as well.

She smiles, a shadow of a smile. She continues for me, she was always the strong one

"We will see each other again, that's how it's supposed to be. Just you and me." her voice is unwavering, she summons all of her last pools of strength as she slowly kisses me on the lips our tears mixing.

"Always" I whisper, pulling away. Her grip on my hand tightens, She smiles one last time.

No! No! No! She cant, no she can't!

"Miley! Baby! No! Don't …No!" I wont believe it, No…she cant leave me...not now, I grab her other hand. Squeezing them together, placing kisses on her knuckles. She looks at me, reaches up and holds my cheek. She wipes away a tear

"Always" She says it so softly. Her hand falls ...her body slumps. The light leaves her eyes. She is gone.

Too fast. Too sudden. I wont…. I cant.

"Miley..Miley, Miley" I'm kissing her all over her face. Her nose, her cheeks, her eyes, her lips. Any thing to try and revive her, I start doing CPR, letting her cold hands go. I blow into her mouth. I can hardly focus I'm crying so god damn hard. I'm yelling and screaming, my hands pumping her chest.

Doctors and Nurses rush in, one pushes me aside. I collapse into the chair, my head in my hands. I see her body; I see the faint smile on her lips. I hear frantic words from the doctors. I see concerned lips from the nurses. I hear her heart stopping beating.

Everyone in the room stops

"Time of death, 12:01" Those words ring in my ears. The nurse who declared them did not care. The words she was saying, they did not matter to her, She didn't know Miley. She never got a chance.

I'm angry. I'm not just angry. I'm Fuming, I'm Livid. I'm furious. How could she leave me!

I stand up; I kick the monitor beside her bed. I'm crying and screaming unintelligible babble. The nurses look frightened, the doctor looks shocked. Miley looks dead.

I 'm next to her bed. I'm thumping her chest

"WHY! WHY! WHY! WHY! WHY!" My voice is leaving me, my throat is burning, and I fall to the floor.

"Why…why.." My voice is small…So small. Her fallen hand is hanging off the side of the bed; I hold it, crying onto it.

I sense the nurses and doctors leaving, looking at me, pity clear in their eyes.

I manage to blurrily see someone rush in. They look at the monitor, then to Miley, then to me. They figure it out pretty quickly.

They come and flop down beside me, I'm still crying, holding her hand.

They try and pull me away, into their own arms. They're stronger than anyway and I am too weak from shock and hurt to really try and stop them.

"Shhhhh, She's gone. She's gone" They hush me, rocking me slowly.

She's gone. She's gone. She's gone.

Those words mean everything to me. They even put a stop to my Crying. I'm numb now. My life stopped. The world stopped spinning. The sun stopped shining. The tides stopped turning. Miley stopped breathing.

Looking back at it now, I know one thing. I can't keep going. I can't ever truly move one. Death is always around us; just as much as life is, but when it happens to you…when someone is taken from you, you cant keep fighting.

No one is that strong. Miley wasn't and neither am I.

I know now that she wasn't leaving me …I had to let her go. But I'll see her again.

When you love someone, you always find them in the end

"This is the way it's supposed to be. Just you and me. Always" Her words hang on my lips.

I whisper to the night sky as I sit on the beach. I see the stars twinkle, just like her eyes.

"Always"

**_._M****issing you gets easier everyday even though it's one day longer since the last time i saw you it's one day closer to the next time i will.**

_A/N Crap. Yeah…Crap. But I needed to write what happened. Recount is my a way of venting. Again using Miley and Lily. Weird. _


End file.
